Reality

As I spend yet another beautiful summer day chained to my cube my mind is left to simmer in its own mush.  Yes, I realize that there are plenty of diagrams I could create, documentation to write, and algorithms to ponder - but yet I find myself slipping slowly away.  Slipping away to that place I like to call home in my head.  Bread Pudding.

First off, here’s a hint to all my faithful fans out there….  If you ever want to impress me and have me love you forever, all you need to do is make me bread pudding.  Its my absolute favorite dessert (right behind it is:  Pineapple Upside Down Cake, followed closely by Lemon Meringue).

The very few memories I have of my childhood include playing ninjas with my older brother.  We had a pond in our backyard growing up, and one year during the "drought" our pond dried up.   We got a pretty big tarp and layed it above the pond and used it as our headquarters.  Late into the night we’d sneak out of bed, put on our ninja outfits and meet at the HQ.  From there we’d shine our chinese throwing stars and properly apply our face paint. 

This one particular night, my brother and I made our way down to the Thompson’s house down the street.  We threw our stars at Curtis’ (some kid that lived in the house) window until he finally woke up.  My brother and I wanted to scare this poor kid so we busted out our numchucks.  We were about 1 minute into our advanced routine when all hell broke loose.  We were standing a little too close to each other when our numchucks became tangled.  My brother and I knocked each other out with such force that we finally came to when the Thompson’s came out and used their garden hose on us.  Luckily, we weren’t too seriously injured.

And looking back on this event about 16 years later puts a smile on my face, just like bread pudding.

Let’s face it, I wouldn’t earn any street/blog cred unless I participated in having at least one entry dedicated to politics.

But, in true Anita fashion, we’ll go a step beyond that and get down to the heart of what everyone really cares about in politics.  The hair…

We start off with our first commander in chief, the original *GW*.  As you can see in the attached picture, GW keeps it nice and simple.  No need for the ‘ol comb over.  No excessive poof.  Just my style.

We skip ahead to the time when things got pretty bad politically in the US.  As you can see, the mounting pressure on our top guy got to the top of his head.  You will notice the what it appears like to be the first case of "elected bed head".  Longer on the sides, with no real direction on the top.  What were people thinking when they elected this guy?

Which brings us along to a president that will forever be linked to honest Abe…  Yep, dishonest Jack.  Now that guy had GREAT hair (for the time at least).  Unfortunately however, it started the trend that we see with today’s politicians — poof on top minus any hair products.  It was fine in the 60s when there was obviously a shortage of medium/firm hold gel products.  But c’mon now, we’ve evolved as a society.  We have progressed.  Show us the gel!

  And finally, my post would not be complete without a shoutout to our current commander in disbelief….  GWjrJr.  His hair is bad enough, he just needs a brain transplant… and a little botox.

My fans have spoke, and I have listened.  I’m back and better than ever.  My new blog will be released the week of June 20th and it will be full of the action packed and exciting entries that you’ve come to expect.  No one will leave unhappy.

While we are working out the final details of the new blog, I want to share with you some of the new features and enhancements.  First off, we will have 2 (count ‘em… 2!) blogs daily on Tuesdays and Thursdays.  We will be dark on Wednesdays.  Mondays and Fridays are reserved for guest blogging, name that tune and haiku’s of the superstars.

Also, for the faithful commenters out there…. I have something exciting coming your way….

Yep, that’s right i’m announcing the first ever rapid rewards program for commenting.  You’ll earn  your first reward after you 5th comment in a week.  Subsequent awards are as follows:

• 1st Reward  = 5 comments in one week
• 2nd Reward = 10 comments in one month
• 3rd Reward = 25 comments in one month

My new online blog store will be opened at the end of the month, so I hope you will check back here for details.

Remember, Thursday June 23rd will be the opening of the new blog.  Special present for the 1st commenter that day!!!

I’m sorry to announce that effective immediately I will cease updating my blog.

Its been great while it lasted, but unfortunately the time has come to hang up my blogs.

I want to thank all of those who have made this possible.  First and foremost i’d like to thank Tim Berners-Lee.  Without him, the internet would have never been created.  Next up i’d like to thank my mom for all that she has done in raising me to be all that I can be.  Finally, i’d like to give a big shout out to my fans, for whom none of this would have been worth it if they weren’t around.

So, until we meet again.

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…done mad lib style…

My Day

by [ ---insert random person's name here--- ]

——————————————————————————————

It started out innocent enough… woke up at [ ---insert time--- ] and rolled out of bed wearing only my [ ---article of clothing--- ].  Took a nice and long stretch and looked into the mirror and said " [ ---groggy comment to start the day--- ] ".

Went into the [ ---room in an apartment--- ] and washed my [ ---body part--- ] and brushed my [ ---element that is on your face--- ].  Went back into the [ ---room in an apartment--- ] and decided on my outfit for the day.

Decided to wear my favorite pair of boxers, you know the ones with the [ ---adjective--- ] [ ---noun--- ] .  Slipped on some tube socks, my [ ---brand name--- ] jeans and a [ ---color--- ] t-Shirt.

As I rolled out the door, I had to make sure that I put at least [ ---number of ounces--- ] of gel into my [ ---element of head--- ] and slapped on enough of my favorite [ ---name of cologne--- ].

Here I sit now at my [ ---part of Schwab--- ] and stare into my life/computer.  Wondering what the [ ---expletive--- ] i’ll write next.

So ask yourself…  what are you inspired by -or- who for that matter?  Ever wake up in the morning, or better yet while you sit at your desk and have that moment where you realize that you have a purpose.. a meaning…  an objective!?!

Well, I found mine.  I’ve met the Picasso of blogs.  I mean, this chik knows how it is, knows how to say it, and on top of it all - shares her vision with the world.

So you might be thinking right now, why the fuck would Anita write this on her very first blog ever…  well, I ask you to think back to that one moment in time when clarity existed for you.

With that my friends, I leave you to find your inspiration.

—word—